AN AFFIRMING PLACE TO CONNECT WITH YOURSELF, YOUR PARTNER, YOUR LIFE. 


Marriage Counseling In Ann Arbor 
Affirming Therapy Across Michigan

Falling in love is easy, staying in love feels damn near impossible sometimes.

You are struggling to communicate your needs to your partner(s). Dealing with jealousy and scared shitless your relationship is changing in ways you are not prepared for. You may find that you are holding on to resentments you swore you would never care about. Perhaps you have things you dont bring up because you dont want the fight that will follow. Sex and love used to feel easier, now even scheduling time together feels like a chore.

Some topics people seeking couples or relationship therapy may be interested in addressing:

  • Jealousy

  • Infidelity

  • Sexual mismatch or sexless relationship

  • Someone cheated and now we might want to open our relationship?

  • We keep having the same damn fight over, and over, and over

  • Should I stay or should I go?

  • I dont even know who I am anymore since having kids and getting married

  • We have been doing this for years and need a tune up or overhaul

  • I am holding my cards so close to me, I want to avoid conflict at all costs and I am ready to EXPLODE!

  • I am not sure if I want to commit to this relationship, the clock is ticking and I feel pressure

Build connection and intimacy through communication and addressing the longstanding issues in your relationship.

You feel alone in your relationship. You want to reconnect but don’t know how. Your ability to communicate with one another needs a tune up. you are in pain, stressed, and unsure what to think about the future of your relationship. Your inner voice is pushing you to focus on yourself as a means to work toward deeper connections with friends and partners. You are overwhelmed at the thought of setting boundaries with the people in your life and end up resentfully complying to keep the peace.

You find yourself in an endless loop of bickering and fighting with your spouse or partner and have had enough. You may even be avoiding conversations for fear of the fight that will come after, in an endless loop of conflict avoidance and pain.

Searching for and finding a therapist to address your pain points is not an easy journey. In fact, it is downright exhausting. Reaching out is the next step to achieving your relationship goals.

Let’s be real……relationships are HARD!

When you add in life stressors and the pandemic, staying connected emotionally and sexually can feel impossible. it’s hard to move through the stages of a relationship when the movies tell us it should be all sunshine and rainbows, and you are overwhelmed with stress and feeling unheard.

Your sex life has dried up, you cant stand the tone your partner talks to you in and you have had enough. You are ready to start having those difficult conversations. Ready to start doing the work to build a lasting relationship or call it quits for good.

Everything we do in couple’s therapy will be tailored to you & your partner.


Attachment

Have you ever noticed there are certain ways each of you behave during a fight that seems to follow a pattern?  One of you may shut down while others continuously try to keep engaging and the push pull of this attachment dance leads everyone to feel more frustrated and fights to get down right nasty sometimes.

Intimacy and Connection

Sex used to be slam against the wall hot and now its ho-hum regular degular. You want to want sex but you cant stop thinking about the fight last week or even more frustrating the fight you wish you had last week. You have kinks or sexual interests you are afraid to share or not quite sure how to talk about and want a space like therapy to bring up your innermost desires.

Marriage Counseling can help you:

  • Have difficult conversations

  • Clearly state your boundaries and desires

  • Explore what you actually want out of your relationship

  • Build intimacy through improved communication

  • Name and address jealousy

  • Stop making assumptions about relationship boundaries and get explicit

  • Decide once and for all if you want to stay in your marriage

  • Discuss the possibility of divorce in the presence of a therapist

 Ready to recommit to yourself and your partner(s)?

Conflict is inevitable.

Romantic comedies have really done us a disservice. No relationship is perfect, despite what you might think after scrolling social media for hours looking for answers of how to fix yours. When people begin a relationship they are all coming to the table with different expectations and assumptions, and no-one is teaching us how to discuss these things from the beginning.

What is truly unfortunate is that we believe admitting we have conflict in our relationship is somehow shameful. If you think about your friends and their relationships, I bet many of those folks are feeling the same ways and not discussing the messy parts of their relationships either. Conflict is a natural part of relationships and I would argue can generate increased intimacy and closeness when done in a way that brings you closer instead of different ends of the same couch. 

Frequently asked questions about couples therapy

  • Typically I like to meet with everyone individually at least once at the beginning of our work together. This is an excellent time for me to do some solo assessing, get to know you a bit outside of your relationship, and discuss your family of origin and any related patterns you may already be aware of.

  • I think the biggest factor in couples/relationship therapy “working” is seeking therapy before things are desperate in your relationship. That doesn’t mean you are a lost cause if things are feeling hopeless, but seeking help before that is beneficial. Another important factor is doing the assignments and skills between sessions. If you are meeting with your therapist for an hour a week, there are so many other hours of that week to be practicing your new skills.

  • Therapy can be scary. Many many many people are worried about being judged or shamed for how they move through the world. It makes a lot of sense your partner may be reluctant. Often when we have a discussion with a partner and get curious about how they are feeling and what they are thinking they feel as though they are an active participant in the discussion. I will send you paperwork that asks you to reflect on what you individually want to do to improve your relationships, go into a conversation with your partner with a similar mindset.

  • I cant tell you how many times this has been a concern from potential clients. Worried I am going to judge them and will be sitting here nailing it and absolutely perfect in all of my relationships. WRONG. News flash, I am also human and royally mess up my own life. However, I do have skills and training to bring things back around and that I can share with you to do the same. I think it is human nature to judge others, but I try really hard to put myself in peoples position and find the pain. if I can find the pain and where people are stuck, I can show empathy and understanding. Besides, judging clients doesn’t usually do so well in helping them make the changes they want to make. I have seen judgmental therapists myself and that is a HARD PASS for me!

Marriage Counseling Michigan